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January 7, 2016

The first night of jet lag, I finally fell asleep around 1 a.m., which makes sense, because I only (only?) let myself get four hours off.  Last night I fell asleep at 12:30 a.m.  Tonight I'm going to set a stretch goal for myself of 11:30.  Maybe then I'll only need three cups of coffee...

 Breakfast was some more egg bake, plus the aforementioned coffee, plus lots of water.  Also, today I was a Real Adult, and checked the weather before I left the house, so I had a coat and gloves and a scarf when it was 16 degrees, and not a quarter-sleeve dress and a blazer.  (Yesterday.  Ahem.)

Lunch was some nitrate-free, low sodium ham, skinny mac & cheese, and a salad.

 Well get ready, because I have a great story and I had TWO salads today!

 At the gym today, my friend told her about her Christmas.  This is important for two reasons:

 1 - It distracted me from all of the push ups, crunches, jump squats, around the worlds, tricep dips, hallway lunges, laps around the track, jogs up and down stairs, etc. that we did

 2 - I guarantee you that if you thought your holidays were stressful, you will reconsider after working out with said friend.  Long story short (details omitted to protect the innocent and the guilty), unless your Christmas involved the following: unprovoked sibling-on-sibling physical violence at a major metropolitan landmark that ended with a police report and hospitalization, adults trying to force alcohol on minors as revenge on other adults in the family, hissy fits in a museum, and buying the family member accused of assault a gun for Christmas, THEN it turns out that you didn't have it so bad.  I only took breaks today to repeatedly remark "what?!  WHAT?!?"
I bet "The Christmas Shoes" is on this album.
Bonus - the talkative lady in the locker room that works out every day (so good for her, I suppose!) asked how my vacation was.  I told her about snorkeling, and that I was excited because it was my first time being successful at it.  She said that it was probably because my zodiac symbol is a fire sign.  Which is kinda crazy because she doesn't know my birthday and I AM a fire sign.  So that's my problem!  It's not my tiny lung capacity or claustrophobia, but the fact that I'm an Aries.  Good to know?
I'm bringing sexy back.
I'm also bringing snorkeling back.
Dinner was some healthy nachos (whole grain tortilla rounds, black beans, jalapenos, cheddar cheese) and the aforementioned salad.  Dessert was graham crackers.

 Then I tried to entertain a friend who was under the weather (and subsequently under the influence of some doctor-provided medication to help with pain).  She frequently works with governors, so I attempted to get her to tell me their secrets so I could sell them to the Huffington Post.  Or Slate.  Or whatever.  Alas, no dice.
Secrets include: Chris Christie is actually a robot controlled by a miniature clone of Pat Roberts.
The guy in the middle has a full back tattoo of Miley Cyrus on a wrecking ball.
Bobby Jindal is an anagram for "Blind by a job!"
Today was good, but more than a little crazy.  We'll give it a Queen Maxima, who is fun but a little crazy herself.
And I ask you, who should ever be forced to choose among an overstated pheasant hat, giant earrings, and hilariously large sleeves?  Not this queen.  Not this queen at all.

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